Have you ever had this feeling before?
You are out with some friend at a party and you meet that really cute guy. He offers you a drink and you start to hit it off. Then he does something that begins to bring back memories for you. He looks at you a certain way or he laughs in a certain way. Either way he is doing something that is oddly familiar to you. You begin to think to yourself De ja Sex: have we dated before?
COULD IT BE DE JA VU?
You start to chalk it up to a bad memory, but this feeling just won’t leave your side. So, you decide to bite the bullet and ask the eternal question… Have we dated before?
Let’s be honest, it does happen. Dating someone again isn’t too far-fetched.
I mean college is a big place, with lots of faces. So, what happens when that new and perfect guy becomes the de ja vu guy? Maybe it wasn’t that memorable when the two of your first went out. Or maybe you guys slept together and the sex wasn’t that great. The sex was so bad that you decided to part ways amicably. Did you use him to self-medicate the pain with a bad breakup. Or was he just using you?
When he comes back to haunt you do you run the other way or confront the ghost?
What happens if you do run the other way? Will he follow you in hopes of getting your attention? Or will he just wait? Will he just wait until the next time around and show his face again? That’s the weird thing about de ja vu experiences they show themselves to you when you least expect it.
SO WHAT DO YOU DO?
You could easily look him in the eyes and say “We’ve dated before, remember?” Or you could nail down a few drinks and figure “Hey, why not. Maybe he has learned something sense we last broke up.”
Drinking copious amounts of alcohol is not the answer.
All it will do is enable you to erase a bad date with bad sex. Which is probably what happened in the first place. Or maybe you only went out with this guy as a rebound and you had no intention of keeping him around full-time. So you figured tons of alcohol and a bad night will erase the pain. But it doesn’t… does it?
The only thing that alcohol will do in this situation is enable you to make a choice that is not the best for you in the first place. It will not take away the sting of bad sex or the guy you would much rather forget.
What happens if when you tell him that you have been together before he doesn’t remember it? What if he does? Could it be that he’s trying not to place the blame on you? So he decides to take the other route instead. Maybe he is playing dumb to see what you remember.
The De Ja Vu guy can be an incredibly awkward moment to live through. It’s like your past coming back to haunt you… a past you might just assume to forget. To make matters worse you don’t know if he is playing dumb or if he really doesn’t remember what happened between the two of you. If this is true, what does that say about your patterns or his? Is he the guy that only appears when there is a break up looming? Or is he the guy that is trying to tell you something?