According to rape statistics at least 10-20 percent of women get raped within a given lifetime. Now when you look at the other more violent crimes in the world it doesn’t seem like a lot, but trust me…it is.
There are things that you need to do once this happens. This is a very traumatic and stressful experience from the emotional to the physical, which is why the sooner you get help the better.
It doesn’t just happen to women either.
Men get raped too.
The reason that we don’t hear so much about the men getting raped is due to fear of others finding out and the male ego. They already feel weird that it happened to them. So they are not going to reach out and tell someone. Men care about their egos a bit too much. It’s because of this that many raped cases and violent crimes regarding men don’t get solved.
There are a number of reasons why women and men feel scared to do something about this once it happens
They are afraid they will be judged by friends.
This is a common fear among some women, but the majority comes from the male side. They are scared of what others will think of them and say. So they keep it all inside and don’t take action. Which causes physical pain later on, not to mention health problems.
They are afraid of what the doctors will say to them.
Many get scared about the doctors believing them. If there isn’t enough physical evidence to look at, many will fear doctors will think the are just wasting their time. In their minds the doctors are looking at them going “Come on guys, I have other patients that need my attention.”
They also feel shameful and guilty over it happening in the first place.
Many look at themselves and think “How could I have let this happen to me. I’m smart I should have done something to stop it.”
Listen, rape happens to even the best of us. Even if we have tools to fight it off, many times you can’t. So don’t blame yourself for letting it happen to you. That is what your attacker wants you to feel. He or she wants you to feel the shame. Psychologically they are taking their own pain and transferring it onto you. They feel out of control and powerless in their own lives, so this is their way of having power.
With rape it’s not about sex, it’s about power.
Don’t confuse the two.
Another reason why so many don’t report the incident is because they know their attacker personally, for the most part. They are afraid of reporting it. With rape it’s always the same line. “I know him. He’s not a stranger…I know him. Why would he do this to me?”
- If this happens to you, tell a trusted friend or family member.
- Once that happens get a medical examination done.
- Do a rape kit.
- Get tested for STDs.
If you have enough evidence, go to the police or campus security.
I know this sounds scary here, but you need to not only get tested, but report it too.
You should also seek counseling. Some of you may be very free with your emotions and some of you may not. But either way you need to seek counseling. Also get in touch with the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network (RAINN). There is also this phone number 800-656-HOPE.
Rape affects every part of your life. And it’s going to take time to get your life back on track. So be patient and good to yourself. Be respectful of your own boundaries. The longer you keep this hidden and don’t take care of yourself, the more your attacker wins and the more your health becomes at risk.