Have you ever walked into your dorm with your boy/girlfriend and had your roommate give you the evil eye? While this seems passive aggressive and childish, there may be a reason for the stink eye.
It can be tough to balance your relationship and your roommates, especially when you live in such close quarters; whether those quarters are a dorm or an apartment, it’s all the same really. You both need space and boundaries and I am going to tell you how to manage both.
Set Time Boundaries
Talk to your roommate about his/her schedule.
If you know your roommate has classes all day on Wednesday, then make that your day with your significant other so you aren’t stepping on your roommate’s toes.
Ask your roommate if there is a preference on what time you spend in the room alone versus when he/she wants alone time.
Set Space Boundaries
Don’t allow your partner to sit in your roommate’s chair, bed, or wherever.
If the space does not belong to you, then don’t step into it.
The more often your roommate comes home to find your boy/girlfriend rifling through his/her refrigerator or sitting in his/her chair, the less likely your roommate will want to cooperate with you.
Ask Before Doing
If you know your roommate has an exam coming up or needs to get a lot of work done one night, it would be wise to ask him/her before inviting your partner over for a makeout sesh or to watch your favorite show together.
The last thing your roommate wants to see is the two of your spooning while he/she is trying to study for an exam.
Set Aside Time For the Two of You
Unless the two of you don’t get along/aren’t close, you should really set aside time each week for the two of you to hang out…alone.
Your roommate does not want to see your partner 24/7, he/she lived with you for a reason: you guys get along and you enjoy each other’s company.
While it’s easy to get swept up in a new (or old) romance, don’t forget the people who loved you before your relationship.
Always set aside time to hang out with your roommate and let him/her know how much you appreciate them being cool with you and your partner spending time in the dorm together.
You may even try getting your friend a little gift just to show him/her what a great roommate you think he/she is. It doesn’t have to be something big, it could be a thirty-rack or a bag of candy; just a little something so they know you appreciate them.
Get Outta the Dorm
Remember, your partner has a dorm (or apartment) too, so you should spend some time over there to give your roommate a break not only from you, but from your partner as well.
Give your roommate space and it will be that much better when you guys get to hang out alone. Remember, you don’t have to always have your partner in the room either; when your roommate is gone, use it as time for yourself too.