Hookups Gone Wrong: Damage Control

One of the worst things in college are bad hookups. While you can blame alcohol, fein blackout, or simply pretend like it never happened, you are always stuck with the memory, not to mention the awkwardness.

But like all things in life, there are ways to fix this; whether you hooked up with your best friend or your boss; if there is a bad hookup, there is a form of damage control.

1. You Hooked Up With Your Best Friend.

This.could.be.awkward. The last thing you want to do is go out on Friday night with your pal and wake up Saturday morning in bed with him/her. Unless you have genuine feelings for your friend, this can really only go badly.

If it isn’t too awkward already, laugh it off and swear you will never do it again; better yet, swear you will never speak of it again! To save both of you embarrassment and questions, keep your hookup private, otherwise everyone is going to think you are dating and this will only add to the awkwardness.

2. You Hooked Up With Your Friends’ EX.

This is bad. While you can try to keep the secret between you and your friends’ ex, this will only last so long. Someone is going to talk eventually and if you are a good friend, it should be you, and it should be soon.

You owe it to your friend to tell him/her the truth, besides, do you really want to risk him/her finding out from someone else and then confronting you about it? It’s easier to own up to what you did and hope your friend forgives you. If your friendship is real, he/she will eventually forgive you and let sleeping dogs lie.

Your friend will also be much more likely to forgive you if you tell the truth and apologize rather than trying to hide it/deny it.

3. You Hooked Up With YOUR EX.

This is never a good idea unless you plan on getting back together. The best thing to do in this situation is to have a mature conversation about why you should no longer hookup. Explain to him/her that neither one of you will ever move on if you continue to be intimate and leave it at that.

The next time you get that text/call at 2am, don’t answer; better yet, if you tell him/her that you are with someone else, they will get the picture and hopefully leave you alone. If you are the one sending the texts, trust me, it isn’t going to get you anywhere. All you are doing is prolonging your pain and extending a breakup that should have ended long ago.

4. You Hooked Up With Someone Gross.

By gross, this can mean anything from someone you find unattractive to someone who makes disgusting comments.

If you wake up disgusted by the person sitting next to you, you need to get out of there ASAP. The person now obviously thinks you ARE attracted to them, so the chances of them leaving you alone is slim unless you take quick action.

This would be another time for you to sever communication and avoid them at all costs. You could offer them an explanation, which would be the right thing to do, but in some cases, it’s just not possible.

5. You Hooked Up With Someone With a Rumored STD.

This can be scary, especially if you find out much later down the road, but the first thing you should do is get yourself to the health center (or your regular doctor) and get checked out for all STD’s.

If you are clean, thank your lucky stars that it was probably just a rumor and nothing else. If your screen comes back irregular, don’t wait to approach the person and confront them about it. They may deny it, but if the person really doesn’t know about the STD, they should.

If the person did know and gave it to you anyway, feel free to tell everyone exactly who infected you and with what.

6. You Hooked Up With a Stalker.

Obviously, I would hope none of you actually have a stalker, but what I mean is you hooked up with someone and now they’re obsessed with you. And if you think this only happens to girls, think again; girls can be the worst stalkers out there because not only are they crazy, they’re smart.

When a bad hookup turns stalker-status, the only way to remedy the situation is to cut off ALL ties of communication, and if it’s extreme, change your Facebook status to in a relationship, add a picture of you and your new “girl/boyfriend”, change your number, or do whatever you have to do to get rid of this psycho.

7. You Hooked Up With Your Roommate

This could be  the most awkward of all hookups. Not only do you live with this person, but you are probably close friends too. You can’t escape the awkwardness and the issue won’t be resolved if you don’t discuss it.

What you should do is talk about why the hookup happened and if continuing to do so would be a good/bad idea. If you both decide you like each other and want to continue, that’s great, but just remember that when/if things go south, you won’t be able to escape the problem since the problem sleeps in the next room.

I would recommend staying away from this hookup as it will only cause you stress in the end. If you fight, you will avoid going home. If you break up, you will avoid him/her and going home home. If he/she brings someone else home, that is just AWKWARD.

There is no good ending to this, so walk away now.

8. You Hooked Up With Your Boss/Teacher

Hooking up  with someone in a position of power may seem like a “cool” or good idea, but it can actually have really bad consequences.

Approach the person in charge and explain that the hookup was a bad idea and ask him/her to keep it a secret. No one needs to know what happened; if either of you talk, it won’t go well for either party involved. If you must, switch/drop the class or quit your job.

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